Today, September 17, 2012

Today’s Project:  Household Catch-up

Get it? Catch-up? HA!

Today was all about cutting myself some slack.  Brace yourself, here’s a list! YAY!

1.  Jammie Day!

It is my firm, un-shakeable opinion that adults should be allowed to spend all day in jammies if they want to, just like toddlers.  The single caveat of this is that you must know you aren’t going to be going out of the house. Or aren’t expecting company.  Because the truth is, I kinda subscribe to the Donna Reed School of Fashion in that I really try to look my best when presenting myself in public.  I feel like it shows a bit of respect for others, but mostly it shows respect for yourself. And your family. I think this is vitally important when you have daughters; to present a confident self-image as a role model since they are bombarded on every side with media, peers, and self-doubts that tell them that how they look or act is wrong and needs to be changed.  If my girls grow up saying, “My mom never went out of the house without doing her hair and putting on lipstick,” I’ll count myself successful. I don't mind embarassing them with my actions, but I don't really want to do it with my clothes...or lack of access to a comb.

The reality is that I’m more like Lucille Ball than Donna Reed.  But even Lucy always looked fabulous while trying to get into Ricky’s show or stuffing chocolates in her face…sigh… I mean, if she can smash grapes with style and perfect lipstick, there’s no reason why I can’t put on a clean shirt/skirt to go to the grocery store.

Although my list of to-do’s was/is quite full for today, I decided I was gonna be gol-durn comfy while I’m running all over the house. YE-AH!  It also helps that I have a cute set of matching PJs to help me feel like I’m at least a little bit of a fashion-ista.  Super-thanks to my thrift-store-goddess friend, I have several sets to choose from.

umm...family? Xmas is soon. Hint hint.

2. Laundry can be exercise

With so many people in our household at any given time, there is always an ebb-and-flow mountain of laundry taunting me.  I truly do try to get it all done in one day, because I just feel SOOOOOOO fabulous when I can look at the hamper and see that it’s empty. Even if it’s for just 10 minutes.  And that’s usually about all the time I get. =)

Our laundry room is in the basement (as I know lots of people’s are), and I try to relish the thought that every time I go up and down those stairs my gluteus is getting a little nudge.  A nudge that says, “Hey! Wake up back there! Stop jiggling and do something useful.”  Although, to paraphrase one of my favorite TV shows: “It’s a conspiracy.  I know my bottom is back there secretly snacking when I’m not looking.”

3. Taking all day to do something is totally legit if it means you are being careful (and even if it doesn’t)

I have a commission to make a steampunk costume for a visual artist that, frankly, I’ve been putting off for about a week.  Mostly because this part of the sewing process is my least favorite;  cutting out of the pattern pieces, pinning the pattern on the fabric and cutting out all of those pieces.  The reality of sewing is that the actual sewing, the part with the ‘whirrrrr’ of the machine attaching the parts together, is the least time-consuming part of the whole process. What takes forever on any sewing project is all the rest of it; cutting, pinning, ironing and hand sewing. UGH!  So I spent the good part of the afternoon with a pair of scissors blanketed in printed tissue paper carving out the pieces I need.

I’m not surprised that I’ve pushed this project until the last minute, it really is my modes-operandi for a large undertaking, I just wish I hadn’t.  Which is how I feel every durn time!  You’d think I would learn. Some day. Some time.  But those thoughts are why this is on my ‘give myself a break’ list.  Because the truth is, as long as I get it done before the gentleman needs it and to his satisfaction, it doesn’t matter when I started. Right?

4.  Lunch doesn’t have to be a sandwich

My girls are attending a new school and, according to my eldest, they have a really good lunch program.  Lunches are made fresh at the school every day instead of being shipped in frozen and just un-bagged and re-heated.  However, school lunches still cost dollars.  And this school lunch will cost me a little over $2 per day.  With two girls demanding food every day, that adds up quick.

Needless-to-say, I encourage my girls to bring a lunch to school.  I custom-made totes for them to bring their lunches in (a future project to show you, dear reader, BTW) and re-usable sandwich wraps to save the environment as well as my wallet.

To make sure that they don’t get all, poo-poo and whiney about having to take a lunch, I try to come up with several different things for them to choose from.  I let them make their own sandwich in the morning and give them lots of choices of fruit/veggies/snack items.  I find if they have a sense of control by making some smart choices (within my parameters), I get a lot less grumbling.

At the beginning of the week, I put things together in such a way as (hopefully) I don’t have to mess with it again.  One of my girls’ favorites are the little snack packs of fruit; like mandarin oranges or peaches.  However, to buy them pre-made at the store can be quite pricey, so I make my own with small, cheap, disposable plastic-ware and canned fruit.  It tastes the same and salvages a few dollars.

I decided to use the leftovers of Bella’s Birthday Bash to make my own ‘lunchables’, something that my youngest asks for all the time, but I think are too expensive and don’t really seem to fill them up.  I took crackers, the pre-cut meats and cheese from the appetizer tray and a few hunks of the ham we served, put them in a plastic-ware, covered with aluminum foil and added a layer of fruit and veggies.  Bella decided it was a ‘mom-able’.  I’ll take that. =)

Ingredients...

Layer #1

Layer #2

5. Don’t get married to your schedule or your to-do list

I do like a well-penned list.  Whether it’s a to-do for today, this week or this year. Or even the individual steps of one of my items on my To-do.  When I can see what I think needs to get done on paper, it’s relieving to my brain; I no longer have to keep all of that stuff in a mental place where I feel the need to be constantly reviewing it to see where I am: what’s done, what’s left, what did I forget?  That sends me down the anxiety freeway with a over-heating brain-radiator faster than lots of things to accomplish. (Car reference for my daddy) =)

BUT one of my issues is, and has often been, generating a feeling of failure if I don’t check off all the items on my list; or frankly, any of the items on my list.  There is such satisfaction in that little check or slash or circle; the mark that identifies that thing as done, done, done-ski.

Today’s life-lesson, which ended up getting applied to all of my tasks today, even though I didn’t realize it at the time, (‘don’t sweat the small stuff’ or ‘in 20 years it won’t matter’ or ‘who the heck cares anyway’ – take your pick of a favorite cliché) was to cut myself a break when it comes to my list. 

If I get one or all or none of the things done on that list, I can still pat myself on the back for making the list.  It really does help me to organize my time and my reasoning to get all those buzzing mosquitoes of ‘don’t you need to’ thoughts out of my head and onto paper.  Then I can spend my brain-time focusing on much more important things. Like what color is Perry Mason’s tie (my fav episodes are in black and white)? Or who am I going to vote for in the upcoming election…of the American Idol champ?  Or who do I know has ordered the ‘Brazillian Butt Lift’ workout video??  And, the most important…will they let me borrow it??

Now, patient reader, the last one on my list of ‘Give RORA a Break!’:

6. Not every scheme for this project is going to be huge…or life-changing…or even exciting.

I find myself in the position of having to remind myself, already, that the point of this experiment was just to make sure I was doing something every day. 

Our society gives women, grown women, such conflicting messages.  We are told that you can be a stay-at-home mom, but you better be the BEST; one of those uber-super-mommies that make the rest of us develop inferiority complexes.  We are also told that you can be a bad-ass-career woman, but you better be the BEST; a CEO or CFO or some other combination of letters that causes the rest of us to feel like we can’t even spell CAT.

But what I’m already realizing through this adventure is that supporting your family is a super-power. And I don’t mean 'support' in a financial way (not that there is anything wrong with being the bread-winner in the house…and being a woman), but in all the other ways that we show our family we love them.  By making sure they have clean underwear. And all their sockies have matches. And that taking your lunch to school is fun.

So. Inner-self Rora, listen!  Cut this woman some slack. Give her a break as she tries to be the best…at being a regular, ol’ mom.